Five Ways To Maintain A Great Marriage

Relationships are work. There's no way around this, but for those who are willing to put the hours in, the rewards can last a lifetime. Let's look at methods that any couple can use to improve their marriage.

Create an atmosphere of trust

Trust is critical in any relationship, but especially in marriage. Knowing that you can rely on your spouse during difficult times helps you face issues as a team rather than by yourself. Trust is hard to create, difficult to maintain, and very easy to break. Being consistent in what you tell your partner helps them understand what you really think about them, whereas varying what you tell them based on whether or not you're in a bad mood leaves them guessing. This makes it difficult for them to trust what you say. Many people have said things during an argument that they later come to regret. It's difficult to keep your cool when insults start flying, but it's also important not to damage your relationship. Chances are that a time will come when you require the trust of your partner and the last thing that you'd want in that situation is them reminding you of something foolish you've previously said.

Sweat the small things

The worst advice given in modern times is to ignore the small things in life. Since most of our lives are made up of a series of small events, it's important to do your best to get each and every interaction right, no matter how minor it might seem at the time. Whether it's throwing out a compliment when needed or doing something that you might find inconvenient at the time, small gestures add up and getting them right makes tackling the bigger issues that much easier.

Sacrifice

Whether ego or freedom, sacrifice in a relationship is one of the keys to long term fulfillment. Being able to admit that you're wrong, or not throwing it in your partner's face when they admit they're in the wrong, goes a long way to demonstrate your commitment. Relationships are the sacrifice of freedom for something greater, a whole that is greater than its individual parts. Sometimes the sacrifices can be small, like watching a TV show with your partner that you might not be particularly enthused with, or perhaps a larger sacrifice like not going out with friends when your partner would prefer you stayed with them at home. It's also particularly important that you notice when your partner makes even the smallest of sacrifices for you so you can make sure to appropriately reward them.

Aim higher together

Self-improvement has been a hot topic lately, and while the methodologies can vastly differ from one another, they all share the same goal. Unfortunately we're born imperfect and those imperfections have consequences, particularly when we try and share our lives with someone else. Nobody wants to be the only one in a relationship trying to improve themselves or their life, so picking goals that you can work toward together can be a great motivator and help you to stay on track. Discuss your individual goals with your partner. Perhaps they can help you figure out methods to attain your goal that you haven't thought of, or they can agree to help you out so you could even obtain them even quicker.

Negotiate

You can't always get what you want and if you remove the possibility of negotiation you increase the probability of war. It's unpleasant to not get your way sometimes, but remember that you're not just looking at one issue; you're also looking at an entire relationship and chances are there'll be plenty of times that you'll get your way and your partner won't. Negotiation doesn't mean capitulation and it's never a good idea to betray your conscience, so sometimes you'll have to stand your ground. But smaller everyday activities, like who does the cooking, can be negotiated so that both of you know exactly what your responsibilities are. If you happen to know you can be a particularly stubborn person, it might work out better for your relationship in the long run to ensure that you don't let your stubbornness dictate your demands.

Jocelyn Farrar 

www.yourlifepathcenter.com